“We can easily forgive a child who is afraid of the dark; the real tragedy of life is when men are afraid of the light.”
Our rescue dog, Nelson, had his first playmates over yesterday, and you should have heard the high-pitched yelping when they first entered the house. He was being so territorial, frightened that this sanctuary that we have created for him was being violated.
Little did I realize that in that moment, Nelson was going to be showing me a valuable lesson that I needed to learn.
For years I have sheltered myself: trying to corner off my part of the bed from my partner, my part of the world from others, my part of self from everyone else, for fear that my security may be threatened. But truly, what am I afraid of? That I might have to step outside my comfort zone? Perhaps a little discomfort might invade this ivory white tower that has become my existence?
When I am closed off to the world, under the precipice of being protective of self, I fail to grow. I can’t expand my being if I stay in the same place, experience the same parts of life, and not venture past my own yard. So why is it that I seem to struggle beyond my own walls?
Fear. Fear of the unknown. Fear of not having enough. Fear of not being enough. Fear of getting hurt. All the same fears that I identified with as an eight year old boy.
So as much as I would like to think that I have grown out of those childhood spooks of the boogeyman, it might just be that they’ve stuck around in different wardrobe and I busy myself to avoid having to face it on a daily basis.
With my previous employment ending a few months back, and a commitment to venture out on my own newly commenced, I am walking through that fear, knowing that if I walk through it in faith, it’s okay that the fear is present, so long as I am moving forward.
Just for today I will know that I safe in the arms of God and nothing can frighten me from my path.